Man, I’ve been busy finishing my book (Mad Men And Bad Men, published by Faber in January 2015 if I get my finger out and finish the bastard thing any time soon) and being editor in chief of Comedy Central’s new online channel. Which is hilarious by the way. But why would you give a fuck about my schedule, right? I mean, you don’t come and bother me with your shit. I’m sorry, this is all coming across as self regarding and obnoxious. So let’s just leave it at this: I’ve been hosting an AWESOME world cup podcast for the last few weeks with an array of brilliant guests including Tim Lovejoy, David Araanovich and even Sepp Blatter himself. I should have mentioned this sooner. But, like I say, who cares? No-one’s reading this anyway. Hello mum. Don’t listen to this, it will confuse and bore you.
The Political Takeout Podcast – hosted by the charming, clever and erudite double-act of Rupert Myers and Bobby Friedman – is BACK! And this time it’s sold out to a mainstream media player, just like in Wayne’s World when Rob Lowe swans in and turns their lo-fi basement production into a sponsored pawn in his sinister corporate machine. Although not really because they’ve been taken up by The Independent which not sinister in the least really. Plus, no-one who works there is remotely as handsome as Rob Lowe. Anyway, I went on as a guest last week alongside Ruth Porter from the IPPR to discuss Tory modernisation and Ed Miliband’s distaste for pubs. It was good fun. Other guests included Louise Mensch and Lembit Opik. I don’t know what they talked about, their bit was separate. Anyway, listen to it here
I was on my way into the Guardian to record the latest episode of the Media Podcast. As I walked out of Kings Cross station I happened to bump into The Ribman, a highly regarded purveyor of pork-based street food. His pulled pork rib sandwiches are renowned as the best available on these islands. And his super-hot Holy Fuck sauce has been known to make grown men cry. The Ribman is also a West Ham supporter so we had exchanged footballing pleasantries on Twitter before but never met face to face. I went over to say hello. He suggested I try one of his sandwiches. It was midday and I’d already had scrambled eggs on toast for breakfast. “Perhaps I’ll grab one in an hour on my way back to the station,” I said. “They’ll be sold out by then,” he said. I didn’t want to be rude. Plus, they looked like the most magnificent culinary constructions I had ever set eyes upon. “Okay, give me a small one,” I told him. Yes, what you see pictured above is the SMALL incarnation of the Ribman’s speciality. I ate it on a bench just round the corner from The Guardian. It took me about 20 minutes to consume. The cold wind blew around me as I scoffed from my polystyrene tray. The Holy Fuck sauce burnt my mouth and belly. My digestive system creaked and cranked and rumbled under the strain of the meat. Finally I wiped my mouth clean, staggered to my feet and went off to record this podcast about increased revenues at ITV, the future of the BBC and something about Global Radio I can’t quite remember. Listen to it, it’s the sound of a man trying to make sense of the baffling media landscape while suffering from the onset of acute meat psychosis.
I was a guest on this week’s Guardian Media Talk Podcast, alongside Steve Ackerman from production company Somethin’ Else and the charming host John Plunkett. During the course of the chat I described all newspapers as boring. It’s worth a listen I reckon.
Here’s the latest episode of the epic West Ham related podcast Stop! Hammertime which I took part in. Talking from my mouth about the Hammers with the wonderful Phil Whelans and spectacular Benji Lanyado. BOOM!